Friday, September 25, 2015

TOKYO - Day 3: Of flamers and fruitloops

EXCLUSIVE FROM FATHER ZILDORF!

I am on vacation, so I am not paying huge attention to the papal visit. That's what vacation is for, right? Plus I don't believe he is the Pope. Neither do my sedevacantist friends at RETROrate. Neither do the seminarians I am turning into pre-Vatican II meaningless relics. Neither does our real Pope, anti-Pope Pius XIII, Truman Cardinal Capote.

Tokyo.


Since my hosts and traveling companions are all living with me off the stupidly generous donations of the very stupid laypeople who read my blog and are dumb enough to think that 1) I believe in God 2) actually pray for anyone at my 15 minute daily Tridentine Requiem Masses, we're eating whatever the hell we feel like eating. Some of it dead. Some of it alive.


I miss the Surging Seminarians of Madison. And all the other delicate devotees I was able to get the dumbest laity to provide pom-pom hats and useless scruple spoons for so that they'll be as irrelevant and useless to the future of the Catholic Church as I am.

Fortunately, the places we hit here in Tokyo are staffed by people who remind me of my favorite seminarians back home.



Even the crazy ethnic chick I have militarizing my clerical shirts has a look-alike here in Tokyo!


The circular basin has boiling water in which we cook veg, tofu and . . . . beef. If you get my drift.


And the waiters who help us get cookin' look just like the cookers! Again, if you get my drift.
Pickles to pick at while working! So to speak.

OK . . . gotta run. So much money donated by the dipshits. So many places to spend it here in Tokyo.

Is the Pretend Pope Still in the US? Never mind. I don't care.







10 comments:

  1. The newest conspiracy theory over at RetroRate is that Pope Benedict was forced to resign by a handful of old European cardinals including Kasper and Daneels. I have to say that I find it hilarious.

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    1. I wish that George Carlin were here to write about this.

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  2. " Take THAT, Pope Francis!" "I will just leave the country when you visit." "That'll show YOU !!"

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  3. Poor Raymond. If they pile any more pancake on him, his nose will start running syrup.

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  4. Funny how Z keeps mentioning how he is not following the pope's visit.

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    1. Exactly.
      "I have told you fifteen times." "I am NOT paying attention to the Pope!!!"

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  5. He has realized that he made a huge misstep with his minions, by exiting the country when Pope Francis visited. That is why he keeps mentioning the Pope's visit.

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  6. Everyone and anyone who counts in US Catholicism is on the east coast, invited to papal events or at the very least, sitting in on someone's TV show. It would have been too embarrassing, I think, for him to be in the country and just hanging out in Wisconsin. No inside scoop, no connections, no favors to pull and invitations to score? He had no choice but to skedaddle.

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    Replies
    1. Sort of what I was thinking. The pope's in town and Z is upset he is not part of the action.

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  7. That thing that the two grapes are sitting on looks a lot like an asshole.

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