Tuesday, July 14, 2015


The Bitter Onions Battalion from RETRO-Ranting-'N-Raving
moves out to find Everyone Who Disagrees With Us


Or should I say "BASTA!" so You-Know-Who finally figures it out?

Oh, isn't that just so sweet!?!

Young, old, in-between. Lovey Dovey. Kissy Huggy.

Oh yeah, that will Win The World Back to Christ!


So our sedevacantist buddies over at RETRO-Ranting-'N-Raving have come up with a Tried-'N-True-'N-Terrific-Traddie way to


"Yes, the headline is true. No, it's not current. This was the message sent to protestants in New York City in the 19th Century by New York's first Archbishop, John Hughes, as his churches and a convent had been burned by those who hated Catholics.

"Was his response to capitulate? Was his response to say we have to first start with understanding and tolerance and look at ourselves to see what we as Catholics were doing to insight the hate and violence? No. The response of this native Irish fighter was to punch back and defend his flock.

"Let's get this clear: we are not suggesting violence against those who persecute us today. [Oh no, not us! Never!] What we are saying emphatically is that we need more than the weak-kneed responses of those of Wuerl [damn him!], Cupich [dares to follow Francis Cardinal Klink?!] or the Great Silence of Pope Francis [NOT OUR POPE, NOT NOW, NOT EVER!] on the attack on true marriage in the United States, Ireland and elsewhere."

And they've got their Team of Traddie Terrors lined up!
Commander-in-Chief of the Knights of Moola anti-Pope Pius XIII
bullet proof tit-warmer-tit-binder
Rollemus, fratres! (Let's Roll, brethren!)
Platoon Commander: Rev. Dr. Bitter Bag o' Onions, M.A., Ph.D., S.T.D., D.Ox., D.Ass., D.Bomb.
(When the facial hair is back, it's KICK ASS TIME, MUTHAS!)
Chief Strategist: In the absence of Dom Ca$h-in FullOfHimself who is busy recording CDs and brewing beer
the Deacon Monk HERMIT of the French Diocese of Too-Loose-Fru-Jus and the new monastic community of one.
Wait till you see HIS version of The Battle of the Bulge!
The Biretta Brigade prepares to Unleash the Lace
on anyone who dares contradict Roman Catholic Teaching
And the foreign allies are armed and ready for combat!
This creature could scare the shit out of anyone!
And he's celebrating with his schismatic sedevacantist friends the ordination of their 666th in-no-freaking-way-utterly-null-and-absolutely-void-like-he-was-for-most-of-his-life! I join all those who hope that the Society of Blessed Marcel Lefebvre will soon set up it's own Frau-D-inariate! Let's kick some Conciliar Ass with The Bishop Fellay Show and those stunningly meaningful Offertory Prayers (most of which didn't even exit in the Sarum Rite! But I digress . . . )

Meanwhile, here's all we've got on our side of the fight.
Oh puhleeeeeeze! That's going to change the world?

I don't think so! And neither does she, the perfect spokesman for our Terrorizing Traddies!
Cue the music, Pearl! Sacred music - not that happy-clappy Latino salsa shit we heard for one whole week! Under the direction of one of yet another two-man Oratory, the Monsignor in charge of providing the new Missal in English who only likes the Old Mass in Latin (what a brilliant idea, thanks Cardinal Rebecca! Sarah!)
sung by the HitlerJugenTootem of the Nation's Capital
whose version of Katy Perry's Teenage Dream is burning up the Home School Hot 100!

Lyrics to: An Army of Youth

An army of youth flying the standards of Truth,
We're fighting for Christ the Lord.
Heads lifted high, Catholic Action our cry,
And the Cross our only sword.
On earth's battle field
Never a vantage we'll yield
As dauntlessly on we swing.
Comrades true, dare and do
'Neath the Queen's white and blue,
For our flag, for our faith,
For Christ the King.

Verse 1: 
Christ hides His face,
From men in lace:
And all our weird birettas too.
Each young boy’s dream,
Our pom-poms scream,
Their colors tell you our status true.
Let weird monks lurk,
(Like that sick jerk),
Did Burke that dainty deacon pick?
Where is Z?
For 'twixt me and thee,
He’d just gulp up this spotted dick. Refrain

Verse 2: 
There’s Cagey’s Pal,
Small San Fran Sal:
Burke’s cappa magna’s really long.
Old Mass again
With only men,
Real ladies here know where they belong.
For Novus O,
We will not show,
Real priests go out to eat a lot.
Where is Z?
Fleecing laity?
All his plane tickets Z-ombies bought.



  1. What does "Bitter Onions" refer to?

    1. Cipolla or cipolle in Italian means onion.

    2. Yes seems to be Bishop Caggiano's gift of a theological advisor to that weird blog.

  2. Ah, old Auldqueen who has left a trail of 'incidents' half-way across the world from Melbourne to London for his solicitation of beefy boyz. Auldqueen's technique is to interest those who he fancies with the idea of improving their serving technique and they they find something in their mouth (and other orifices). And what did Porky Pell do? He simply suggested Auldqueen should leave the clerical state. Reid has probably sucked off Pius XIII and Ratzinger to further his demonic end(s).

  3. So, who's the bastard who requested the marching refrain that conjured up Confirmation circa 1953?

    (Leaving disappointed for lack of word play on Fellay's name.)

  4. The typo in the top line "rotestants" throws the whole thing off. It is not much of a powerful statement with that. I couldn't figure out what they were talking about at first.

  5. OMG! We sang that song in 1966 during the May procession. No wonder I went Protty. LOL!

    Thanks for the memories, I think.

  6. I see one of New Direction (you refer to them as One Erection, Reynaldo's fav boy band) is having a baby. But I guess NOT with Reynaldo.

    1. To my knowledge, Reynaldo is not pregnant. (not for a lack of trying I'm told.)

    2. "It is better to cast your seed in the belly of a whore than spill it on the ground."

    3. No such verse in the Bible...

    4. Onions has given me cause to remember my dear lovely Aunt Maybelle... She had draperies and slipcovers made from the same pattern!

  7. The author of the original march was the famed Jesuit author, Daniel Lord, S.J., who wrote it in 1933 !!!! But talk about dated. Who sings this? Some gang of home-schooled right wing nut job offspring no doubt.

  8. now tell me, I am a bit curious about the good Monsignor with the black ribbon 'round his neck. what medal is he wearing? If I read my rubrics right, in neither the pre-conciliar rite nor the current rite is a priest (or prelate) permitted to wear any sort of decoration, civil or religious, over one's Mass vestments. Certainly in the old rite even a bishop (or above) had to wear his pectoral cross beneath the chasuble (and tunicle and dalmatic etc) if a pectoral cross had to be worn beneath the vestments and not over them, i would imagine the victoria cross or the croix de guerre or whatever bauble his reverence is wearing is a departure from tradition

    1. looks like an old LA Kings logo, esp. with the gold and purple.


    2. I am sure it has more to do with queens than kings.

  9. I thought it was a relative of Tom Menino of blessed memory.

  10. How many days indulgence does Platoon Commander get for holding his hands in the ritually approved manner?

    1. Hmmmm... None. Indulgences are bullshit, they serve no purpose but to line the pockets of corrupt charlatans masquerading as priests of a real church.

  11. Zzzzz is taking some 'well deserved?' R&R. I see he is on 'Ground delay. Grrrr.' Couldn't happen to a nicer guy.