Tuesday, June 23, 2015

FURIOUSLY FICKLE FRATERNAL FINGERS

Father D and his co-workers from his days working in the chancery.


I often say that I'd be much better off if I avoided reading all these blogs written (with such intense devotion for self promotion) by blogger priests.  If only if could be said (once again) about me, if ignorance is bliss, old Juan Todd must be the happiest man on earth.  But alas even when I have a moment of rare self discipline, or a day when I'm too busy covering my own azz, to read their shtako, someone will email, text, tweet or facebook share a link to something stupid, irritating or obnoxious.  

So I'm mentally preparing myself for the exam one gets around the age of fifty. Then some kind reader sends me a text to a blog entry with this picture.



Thank goodness he discerned a call to career in the priesthood rather than as a urologist or proctologist.  Only thing worse than a slothful begging presbyter is a stubby fat fingered proctologist.
Of course some people combine careers: this was the Father Rectum Rector of our seminary.
Speaking of shit and assholes... What else is going on in the Fickle Fraternity of the krazy katholic blogosphere?

Rev'd Mum M. John Cunniwicke, OLW is having a bit of a gin and tonic soaked ramble on the English Ordinariate, Groins and Pusey and the need to bend our minds and conform... I'm sure regular readers (and readerettes) will agree that Father D's mind is already bent enough and that it's certainly too late for me to attempt to conform to the clerical norm (see what I did there?) as promulgated by the League of Blogger Priests.  On top of that imagine the bollocks of the clergy of the Ordinariate of Our Lady of Walsingsnark (OLW) teaching anyone to conform! (We'll convert, but not until we're promised speedy ordinations, prelatial titles and the privilege of pontifical regalia that most Latin Rite Monsignori have been forbidden to wear for the last fifty years!) Bugger me till I'm bald and blind! 


Father "Bobby Walnuts" Sirico at Acton U.
So, Pere Zed is Teaching at Acton University (is that a Catholic institution? and what would Saint Augustine have to say about Action U?) and Paulie Walnuts' brother Bobby is all but outright condemning the economic statements and implications of Laudato Si and merely giving lip service to Rerum Novarum and Centesimus Annus (saw "anus" and thought it was about himself!) with the emphasis being on the "preferential option for liberty."  Certainly not all of the statements in the encyclical are infallible, right? We good and faithful Katholics can give as much assent to this encyclical on the environment as all the dirty cafeteria catholic liberals give to Humanae Vitae, right Zombies? And notice that none of these clerical phonies ever tells you that Exxon, among others, has donated over $300,000 to Acton over the years!


Look, Father D can barely balance his own checkbook, never mind getting my mind around socio-economic theories. This is why instead of going to Acton U this past week I offered Mass, anointed the sick and heard confessions. Someone even sent in a picture of me in action. Our ratio here is something like 5,000 venial sins to one damn good and juicy mortal sin. So Yawwwwn!



Upon returning from his graduate lecture at A.U. Big Zed posted another plug for the upcoming book by Father Reggie Foster, OCD (to be pre-ordered through the Zombie Link to Amazon of course.)  I do not know Father Reggie. I am blessed to know a couple of his long time students and have been entertained by many of their Reggie stories over the years.  Most folks who have heard of him know that his regular "habit" has for years consisted of blue Dickies style work pants and a blue, usually denim, shirt rather than the "habit of poverty" it costs the Discalced Carmelites roughly $450 a piece to have made. (Has anyone ever seen Father Reggie in habit or clerical collar?  Almost a rare image as seeing Zed pictured without a collar I bet.)   In spite of his hyper critical attitude of most Vatican Two clergy of a certain age, Zuhlsdorf takes no pot shots at the revered Carmelite priest friar and long time Vatican Latinist, in spite of Father Reggie's open disdain for clericalism and the efforts to return to the use of Latin in the Liturgy.  I'd love to hear Father Reggie's take on our venerable brother Father Z, especially having heard of his comment about one Curial Cardinal being the meanest son of a bitch in the Vatican. (Who knew that SOB would soon be elected pope!)



Yes. Yes I do. And Father D wants to give every last one of those miserable Katholic Krazy Blogger Assholes the Bad Finger! Come and Get It!

26 comments:

  1. Fr D. I am afraid your cover has been blown. $450 for a Carmelite habit? Clearly you are a friar of the Cloth, about whom St Teresa has a number of choice things to say.

    My own Carmelite habit was free and is still going after more than twenty years. Admittedly it is looking its age. Anyway, I incline to the observance of Reggie Foster in the matter of habit wearing. Reggie saved me once when I was visiting Rome. I was locked out when I arrived back at the monastery at 10.00pm. The gates were locked, the walls were over twelve feet high. As I walked across the piazza to attempt to call and be rescued I saw a figure in blue overalls slinking towards the gate. It was Reggie himself. He informed me my plan of calling the monastery was a good one but useless due to the contemptus mundi of the Friars. Indeed, Reggie was a droll companion and an engaging teacher. His tours of the Vatican were also well informed. It was clear his heart was with Jesus more than Renaissance or Baroque versions of the papacy which shaped the grand rooms.

    In regard to confessions. Our city has a Marist church in the centre of town. A Dutch priest was there for fifty years hearing confessions for hours every day. Towards the end of his life he was interviewed by the press. The reporter suggested that surely he had heard many mortal sins. No, he replied, I do not believe I have ever heard a mortal sin in confession. No wonder the compassionate priest was the confessor to the city. May he now enjoy the mercy of God.

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    1. Talk about blown cover. Van Houte, Church Hill, Varroville . . .

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    2. That Marist priest reminds me of the holy and venerable Padre Capello, SJ, of the Gregorian and the GesĂș. He was called the "second confessor of Rome"(Philip Neri, of course, being the first.). He was kbown for being very gentle and understanding. Even Padre Pio once scolded a person who travelled from Rome to San Giovanni Rotondo to confess to him. Padre Pio said: " You came all the way from Rome?! You have Fr. Capello up there! He can do much better than i can, go see him!". Fr. Capello would tell his priest students that they must always be gentle. "Principles are principles, and they remain firm and are always to be defended. But all consciences are not the same. In applying principles to consciences, we must do it with great prudence, much common sense, and much goodness. In your opinions and decisions never be severe. The Lord does not want that. Be always just, but never severe. Give the solution that offers the soul some room in which to breathe.”

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  2. Zed's fingers look disturbingly like a spilled tin of vienna sausages.

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    1. Well as Z himself has declared several times on his blog, he does have quite a taste for dick, spotted and otherwise. Clotted cream too I suppose.

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    2. An old and dear friend who is now retired from the priesthood enjoyed the same Upmanns cigars I once did... He would only smoke at our private club and never in a lady's presence.

      A man with class and refinement; everything Z is not...

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  3. The Z-ster still doesn't get the joke that Foster is playing on him.

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  4. Z has made a donation to Supertradmum's gofundme page. STM is now raising money to buy herself a house (of prayer). I could n't below e Z donated.

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    1. I meant "I couldn't believe he donated." It disturbs me though when I see Catholics setting themselves up as charities. Perhaps I shouldn't be critical but nothing is wrong with working.

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    2. Do you think that STM would last a minute in a real job?

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    3. Don't get too excited about his donation. That $3.50 won't go far toward funding any kind of a house.

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    4. I think STM is beyond retirement age anyway, but I am not sure whether she could hold down a real job. Maybe I am being critical, but sometimes I see this kind of thing as "cheating." I am sure STM needs a place to live, so if this is the way she can get it then no harm, I guess. But I have seen other Christians begging for themselves on the internet because they have to do what they want right NOW when I think working might be a better option. No different than people going on gofundme because they want a nice honeymoon or something. Nothing is wrong with a nice honeymoon, but not something worth fundraising for. Perhaps I am too critical of this kind of thing.

      Anonymous 5:59, I think he was her first donor at 50 bucks!

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  5. This little diktat from the long time fan of spotted ditkats probably indicates that a growing and alarming (to Lard Ass) number of commenters are posting remarks which are cutting through his outer defences and are exposing his monumental hubris/ dissemblance and fraudulence:

    Do you have a comment? Think BEFORE posting!

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  6. He was whining that only 4 people had signed up to give monthly contributions this month.
    Maybe people are finally catching on to the scam.

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    1. Probably. He has pulled this whining stunt regularly for months now. The stupid selfies he posts on his crassly self-indulgent will gradually start to alert even the staunchest of his followers that he is cynically exploiting them.
      On the point I was alluding to, you might take a look at his latest set-piece Dorothy Dix bogus 'Ask Father' about a fellow saying he can't meet his Sunday 'Obligation' because of his work. After typically laying down the hard line controlling, manipulative bullshit, which has no grounding in official doctrine or law, he has met a growing response from posters who are calling him out for his irrational law and order over standard Catholic common sense and perspective. Lard Ass has begun to type (in redactional red) his self-justifying amendments.

      Zuhlsdorf is a monumentally ignorant high-maintenance, high-cost danger to the faith of vulnerable, scrupulous and all too easily led Catholics.

      The sooner Morlino pulls his episcopal digit out of his fundamental orifice and escorts the fraud to the boundaries of his diocese the better. An escort to Detroit airport with a ticket to Rome + bus ticket to Villetri-Segni would be a huge move forward.

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    2. Take note, four donors THAT DAY of the month. He would like 20 regular donors each day of the month. Nice huh?

      He is getting paid for his work in the Madison Diocese, according to the website he works full time, and he begs for five Gs each month. Great gig.

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    3. And that's the Five G he owns up to.
      According to the rough and tumble of a sound Eschatology, when he becomes unstuck, it'll be in a very big time, much bigger than the Corapi debacle.

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    4. of course it will. You have someone who is paying no taxes, who is openly advocating for political positions, who is soliciting money in exchange for services. Even ignoring the grave abuse of canon law (actually, on the same level as sodomy, Zed--your habit of promising to pray for people in exchange for money--a "gravior" sin!), what he's doing is illegal--and easily prosecuted if anyone gave a shit. Once they DO give a shit (say, around election time), we're going to see our portly friend packed off to a "weight loss center" that is "tailored for priests," at which he will "languish" for "years on end."

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    5. Look at those big full plump lips on Zuhlly. I bet in his younger days he's kissed enough ass and sucked on enough spotted and wrinkled dick to have made a few friends in sacred purple in Rome that are looking out for him. He'll never go back to his home diocese as he will always have some purple prick willing to give him some type of shelter. Its obvious hes so tight with Morlino that as long as he has a See, Zuhlsdorf will have a roof over his head.

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  7. So STM is becoming as tawdry as z. She has raised almost $3500 in 1 day so far, and is already complaining on her blog that she needs MORE. I suspect she wants a place to live, fair enough, but she says her house a prayer is necessary so that she can explain things like the pope's encyclical - what's correct and what's wrong in it. Z will never go on gofundme since it tallies the contributions for everyone to see. Z wants 20 donors a day? He is probably budgeting for $500 per day. What a racket.

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    1. She is asking for $150,000.

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  8. Dear Miss Zuhlsdorf,

    If you weren't such a pussy you would have open discussion on your blog about this, but since you're nothing but a bold faced scam artist, I will address your sorry visage here.

    First, you ignorant slob, it is THE United States, not "These USA".

    Sorry you are going to have to shit in your biretta again... YOU LOSE, ASSHOLE.

    Why don't you and Faddah Pauly Walnuts go do what you normally do, have a large lunch together and scam some more $$ from the faithful.

    The entertainment on your blog is getting better and better.... the TRUTH is coming for you and when it grabs you and takes you down to where you deserve to be it will be folks from this blog who will sincerely pray for forgiveness for you rather than the justice you deserve.

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    1. Hey Fatso, I think your boy Clarence is a sex offender who got away with it.

      Praise God for Justice Ginsburg and Chief Justice Roberts along with the large majority who checked the corporatist efforts to destroy the Affordable Care Act.

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  9. Grubby Podgy Digits thumps the table with rage and resentment as he vents against those who, clearly having been previously vetted, have dared to challenge his bullshit and hubris, call him out on his ignorance and bias and showed him up as the complete an utter fraud he is.
    I wonder how long it will take to filter through the ranks of the unthinking subscribers that Lard Ass is double dipping financially: taking the purse from the diocese or Latin Mass society and then the $5,0000 'stipend'.


    "Even as you read, right now, this blog is under siege by vile spammers trying to register to post their putrid slime. I now have logs that show me what’s going on.

    I ratcheted up the drawbridge and released the gators into the moat. Oil is on the boil.

    To comment here, you have to be registered and your registration must be approved. Registrations go into a queue, which I check when I can."

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  10. One of Z's QandAs is about marriage. I can't even understand it. I think he makes up the questions himself. The couple has been married for 31 years and puts the word "married" in scare quotes. Then the question moves on to how they can barely resist the temptation to live as husband and wife, but have been living as brother and sister. If anyone talks about their marriage this way after being together for 31 years, they have no self-respect. The real give away that it isn't a real question, the person posing the question said that their pastor was not able to give them guidance on the matter, that they should take the question to Fr. Z. I can't believe that any real pastor, no matter where he stands on the ideological spectrum, would never send a person seeking counsel to a hack on the internet.

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  11. Maybe "Bobby Walnuts" Sirico would enjoy some of these:

    http://www.imdb.com/character/ch0011342/quotes

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