Saturday, May 30, 2015

DISPATCHES FROM THE FRONT . . . uh, make that THE REAR: KRUIZIN' the KRAZY KATHOLIC KRAPOSPHERE

LENNONGRAD

Entrance to the Cleveland Chancery Office and Bishop's Compound
After dropping off his soiled and stainéd undies in Madison for the Sister Servants of the Indelibly Imprinted Dilettantes to purge and starch, the still-secretly-Lutheran Father Droolzedorf wings his way out to lay hands on another seminarian whose "call" has been on hold since the late 50s and get him duly ordained for a Church that no longer exists except in the fantasies of love those with a fervent attachment to lace and brocade, in order to enrich a chapel-veil addicted community with a Mass that was abrogated 50 years ago. Backward march! (Don't trip over that lace alb!). There's a great story about the airline people trying to get Lard Ass not to spit his food all over their clean lounge. And apparently there were readers of this blog on his plane, since he was hit on the head by several bags as he squeezed his way down the aisle and onto his aerial throne. (Some airlines require certain folks to buy two tickets these days. At least he could buckle his backpack in next to him.) And a little shout out to the Crusader Cadets leading the march backwards, the HitlerJugenTutem who shelled out the shekels awhile back at Harvard to attend one of Z's Ass-Facing-The-People Performances. And wine and dine him before and after. (So much for Traditional notions of fasting. Funny how that works.. Old Mass with the New Rules when it suits ones taste.)

But before leaving, Z took time to grab some more laity-donated drinking money and, speaking of drinking, give us the good news from Cleveland, better known to the inmates priests, deacons and religious there as Lennongrad.
Another bishop supports the idea that teachers in Catholic schools must serve also as role models. The Cardinal New (and you thought Z hated all things new!) Society, which watches the status quaestionis of Catholic education in these USA, has a letter that His Excellency Most Rev. Richard Lennon, Bishop of Cleveland, sent to teachers in the diocese entrusted sentenced to his care tantrums.

That's right! So it's not just Silly San Fran Sal who wants really real True Catholics teaching but, The Most Reverend Richard "But Everyone Who Knows Me Calls Me Dick" Lennon does too!
Cleveland’s Catholic teachers and school leaders sign a contract “which recognizes his/her role as minister and role model of the Faith,” Diocesan spokesman  Robert Tayek explained to the Newman Society. The contract agreement for administrators states:The Administrator-minister further understands and acknowledges that it is the teaching of the Roman Catholic Church that administrators in a Catholic school are truly and in a very real sense engaged in a special ministry, or apostolate, of the Roman Catholic Church and that such administrators should be witness to Christ in their lives as much as in their classroom instruction.This “morality” clause “has always been a part of the teacher-minister contracts for elementary and secondary educators in the Diocese of Cleveland,” Tayek continued.

"Role model for the Faith"! and "Witness to Christ!" Wow! Anyone who's ever been on the receiving end of one of Dick's Dumpings, (TM) oral or scribbled, knows Lennongrad is the right place to learn how to do that. I mean, not every Bishop is so beloved of his flock that he has to wear a bullet-proof vest to Confirmation and welcome Vatican Snoops to Chat with the Troops.

Amtrak still goes through the compound twice a day: if you're anywhere near the station, grab a ride in either direction.

BITTER BAG O' ONIONS


Bitter Onions relaxing at home by excommunicating everyone else
From the disgruntled but still-secretly Anglican pod of the Kraposphere, US sector, comes a truly Christian way of characterizing your fellow believers with whom you disagree:

The Subverters of the Word of GodThe high priest then questioned Jesus about his disciples and his teaching. Jesus answered him, "I have spoken openly to the world; I have always taught in synagogues and in the temple, where all Jews come together; I have said nothing secretly." (Jn 18:19-20)
***
May their names live in infamy forever and ever for their intent to assemble secretly to discard the clear words of Our Lord Jesus Christ in the name of Him Who Himself is Love, and to favor a certain kind of press to make their new doctrine known to the world:
They go on to list those they've condemned to everlasting flames, having watched the excommunication scene from Becket more times than they've hung out with their wives and having paid vestment-makers a fortune to dress them up like Richard Burton!


FRAUDINARIATE OF OUR LADY OF SNARKINGHAM

And, finally, from the still-secretly Anglican pod of the Kraposphere, UK sector, comes someone who looks nothing like Richard Burton, actually more like Dame Edith Evans. And not even in her habit. Try this:

Yes, that's better.
So Reverend Mother M. John Cunniwicke, so testy when it comes to people chatting about the boyfriends being ordained together for the Fraudinariate, joins his fellow Anglicans at RETROrate to whisper about Synodal Secrecy. Another one who wants Vatican transparency one ONE topic while rejoicing in its secrecy on OTHER topics. 

While the Poor Old Thing (TM) truly HATES all things Francis, he's going to post this "tease" first
It is a deeply Catholic instinct, and an immensely sound one, to be very shy of disagreeing with a Pope, even when he is speaking non-Magisterially. Technically, a Christian can adhere dutifully to a Magisterial statement while expressing himself in a robust and demotic way (just as Pope Francis often does!) about the non-Magisterial utterances. But in fact, the love we naturally feel for the Vicar of S Peter dissuades us from sounding critical, even though, in terms of rights we have every right to do so. And a cleric with a mandate to teach in the Church's name ought to feel particularly uneasy about any sort of public dissent from the Supreme Pontiff's lightest word. Before he does so, he must weigh the matter in terms both theological and prudential. So I have given this a great deal of very careful thought.

Just to give his rather plain and ordinary Ordinary, Not-A-Real-Bishop-But-Dressed-Up-Like-One, Fig Newton some cover from what, speaking of whispers, one hears is increasing pressure to be . . . well . . . to be Catholic instead of still Anglican!

20 comments:

  1. Do not forget to revisit my home country Fr D. Canada awaits your return on the blogosphere!!!

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    1. Dollar For My Collar? So I can yell and holler?
      I'm surprised that Merkin Voris is rather active in a certain area of Canada and that his sublet office chum Paul Pay Me to Preach Nicholson moves so easily back and forth between Canada and the USA. Obviously the Northern Boarder of These USA needs to be more steadily secured from Canadian Clerics off the leash.
      I need a full time assistant just to monitor all the blogs! Perhaps one of the newly ordained deacons could be assigned to assist me. I'll have to look into that.
      In the meantime, if you see something crazy, drop me a note. fatherjtd(at)gmail.com.

      I've often thought that "next year" I'm going to make the time to spend a couple days at Quebec Winter Carnival. It has been almost twenty years since I last made that pilgrimage, which always included stops at Notre-Dame de Québec, and Ste Anne's.

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  2. You gotta read Fr ZZZZ more closely. First, his description of the about-to-be-ordained priest:

    He is, as you might remember, the author of the parody songs I’ve done from time to time.

    D’you think he sings them with Bish Morlino at the piano? At sacerdotal get-togethers? Priestly parties? Ontologically superior tete-a-tetes?

    And then we have:

    So I walk into a Delta Sky Club at DTW-B and “Maria” at the desk sends a young man to chase me down to tell me that I can’t eat it in the club. I wasn’t trying to by the way, but, damn, Maria had me hunted down.

    OK, now, inquiring minds and Auntie wanna know this: what or who was the ‘it’ that Father ZZZZ was about to eat?

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    1. Father D caught that as well, but decided to take the high road-- for a change. Kind of.
      May the angels watch over "Maria" at DTW-B and keep her safe in the event of a Zzzzzombie backlash.

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  3. And this priceless little bit of barking mad Genghis Khan Katholikism posted by Rabid Robbi in Tancred's Effeminate Flower Pot:

    Robbie May 28, 2015 at 1:30 PM

    "The real treason comes from the very top. Bergoglio, who has something to say about everything and anything, said absolutely nothing in the lead up to the Irish vote. Why? Well, my guess is one of two things. First, he didn't want to tarnish the halo he's received from the worldwide press. The other is he was more than fine with Ireland voting for sodomy. After all, who is he to judge?

    We're living in a terrible time for Catholicism. We have a pope who cares nothing about doctrine and theology. Instead, he seems to see the Church as an appendage of the United Nations and himself as its quasi-spiritual leader. Consider this. Rather than defend the truth about marriage, he and his goons have been crafting an encyclical on the environment. What a joke!

    The Catholic Church is in shambles and Bergoglio is making sure there are no survivors. I can only hope the Holy Spirit, however it chooses, intervenes to stop this unholy madness. The few conservative and traditional Cardinals who are left in the College must stand up and stop this. They can arrest this rapid decline, but only if they finally speak out against this nonsense."

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  4. Why do you continually bestow the august name of Anglican upon these members of the popish ordinariate? Have they ever used the services and none other as appear in the real BCP? Have they ever served in prayerbook style churches?Have they ever devoted themselves to the Thirty-nine Articles of Religion?

    Anglo-catholic they may be, but Anglican???

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    Replies
    1. O Venerable One, you make a good point.
      I will try to be more careful in the future not to offend Good and Sensible Anglicans whom I suspect are the greatest supporters of S.P. as the Ordinariates have given homes to those odd clerics that they long sought to be rid of.

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  5. Where the hell do they think they're going to get all these diploma'd and licensed teachers who are 101% imprimatur-approved by Opus Dei? Let them do their purges and when our schools close and have their pure orthodox miserable Church to themselves. I'm close to done with being Catholic.

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    1. Actually 907AM I am the closest to being Catholic again because of this blog and the actions of Pope Francis...

      The "old school" is truly melting away and to it, Good Riddance.

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    2. Good old Gin & Tonic FizzyNose, he never forgot the first time but, obviously, the second time didn't work at all. Aaagh Nostalgia:

      Ordination Season

      "Trinity Sunday, according to the very ancient tradition of the Latin Church, used to be the main day for Ordinations in the West: prepared for by the Pentecost Ember Week. Before both the Catholic Church and the Anglican Communion fiddled with their respective rites, the same words appeared in both the Roman Pontifical and the Prayer Book Ordinal as the Bishop laid hands upon the ordinandi: the Lord's own words to his disciples about the Gift of the Spirit for the forgiveness of sins. And the reading at Morning Prayer, in both Churches, was that superb passage from Isaiah about the Divine Glory: "And I said: here am I; send me".

      47 years ago, Harry Carpenter laid his hands on me, on exactly the same spot as a former Bishop of Oxford did the same thing on a Trinity Sunday to Blessed John Henry Newman ... just a few yards from the bones of Oxford's Saxon Patron S Frideswide and those of Dr Pusey and the tomb of the last Abbot of Oseney, first Bishop of Oxford.

      My good wishes to all priests who were ordained on a Trinity Sunday. Let us pray for each other."



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  6. Miss Zuhlsdorf and Father Hitler from Manhattan's panties are all bunched because the PEOPLE of Ireland have stood up against centuries of church tyranny.

    May you join your boy Finn in an early retirement.

    That loud flushing sound is the remainder of your self entitled careerism spinning down the shitter's vortex.

    May the Almighty grant me long enough life to see you washed away like a shit stain on the pavement.

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    1. Did someone say VORTEX? Where lies and falsehoods are given a positive spin!

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    2. Gee, I wasn't even thinking of Mikey Merkin... I've been working on getting Zully on the SPLC hate group list.

      After that I think we could prevail on the Church to shut down his sickness.

      If Zully is barred from acting as a priest of the Catholic Church his funding sources will dry up... His blog would be reduced to the status of one among many racist homophobic pieces of shit.

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    3. Hey Merk... I don't know if you've noticed but the real clitiVoris is actively denouncing gays in the K of C or is that KFC?

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    4. Talk about tilting at windmills!

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    5. Missy V. is bashing gays again?
      Anything to keep people from noticing his young "protege" from Australia.

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    6. You are obviously referring to 'Bruce-in-Boots.' *TM

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  7. Bonkers and bats in the belfry:

    "But then things got even better: I recalled that our Lady's title Mother of Mercy was very dear to my old friend, John De Grandisson (pronounced Grahns'n), Bishop of Exeter in the fourteenth century. Even more progress! Back to John XXII!! Vive d'Euse!

    Yet stay! Was not this title of our Lady on the dying lips of the much loved S Richard of Chichester, Chancellor of this University, in the century before? Faster still!! Ahead to the thirteenth century!

    [The Missae pro aliquibus locis include a Mass for our Lady of Mercy. I expect we shall all be using it a lot during the Jubilee year. Will the Ecclesia Dei people give it an enhanced status so that it trumps ordinary double ... I mean, III class ... feasts?] "
    And regular pew sitting Catholics are actually funding this poncing, effete lunatic.

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    1. Perhaps I am a tad bit of a 'tard, but I really do have trouble understanding what Jolly Ole Gin n Tonic is talking about. It almost seems as if he is following up on a previous conversation.

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    2. Bru Bru from ICEL?

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