Then I opened my email and was reminded of those incredibly whacked men whose idiocy helped demolish the Church into the wreck it is only beginning to recover from today and how they just won't shut up, won't go away, and get sucked up into their eternal reward.
Come on now. I admit that those attached to the Traditional Latin Mass as well as the traditional expressions of the Catholic Faith were not given the pastoral attention they needed during the years after the Council. Ecclesia Dei adflicta left the local Ordinary to implement the use of the older rite. Many refused to do so, only adding to the resentment, anger and isolation of those wanting the older rite.
Then, Pope Benedict loosened most restrictions, and limited the authority of the local ordinary to shepherd his diocese. Certainly what many behaviorists would call an over correction.
Rather than being grateful for the freedoms granted through Summorum Pontificum, many have attempted to impose their preferences for what they believe is the glory of the olden days and the olden ways, exemplified in Going My Way, on those who have never known of, or who have gladly moved on from, the Traditional (once abrogated now restored) older form of the Latin Mass.
One of the leaders of the
There's Bishop Fabian Bruskewitz all dressed up for his daily yoga session.
Just kidding. The Most Reverend Dinosaur, formerly of Lincoln, Nebraska, has just reminded us all that YOGA Can Ruin Your Faith.
|Bishop "Fabe the Babe" teaching the newly ordained the only |
morally acceptable Catholic form of stretching allowed.
The website shows exactly what Bishop Bruskewitz is worried about with pictures of convents showing the nuns vainly attempting to deepen their contemplative lives by doing yoga.
The (not-so) Little Sisters of the Madonna of Mercy:
Sister Tabitha of the Sisters Servants of the Scourging at the Pillar:
Sister Wanda of the Sisters of Seamen and Seawomen, nicknamed "the Misericordia Mermaids" doing the posture known as "The Purposeful Porpoise":
The Bishop had a helpful alternative suggestion: Grab a pair of balls! Chinese Baoding Balls. Or as we fans of Father Z call them: Badda-Bing Balls!
“Don't think I don't understand how we all need to relax in this modern world. But instead of twisting your bodies into shapes God never intended them to go, and forgetting the 20 mysteries of the Rosary, the 12 Fruits of the Holy Ghost, and the 767 rubrics of the Solemn High Tridentine Mass which you ladies are never going to be able to say anyhow, grab a pair of balls.” he said. "It works for me every time. And I KNOW it will work for you!
They come gift boxed in a color meant to remind us of the Holy
“Oh you'll know," Bishop Bruskewitz smiled. "You'll just know, honey! Trust me! I always do!"
And can you lose weight just by grabbing your balls like that?
“Well," said Bishop Bruskewitz, "I went from real big to this big! And I owe it all to those amazing balls!"
And by the time the ball-grabbing was over, Deacons were able to carry Formerly Fat Fabe into Mass in this modified Sedia Gestatoria (a gift from Cardinal Burke, who doesn't need it back until his Papal Coronation).
|Deacons Carry Bishop Bruskewitz Into Mass: Ecce Sacerdos Parvus!|