Tuesday, January 27, 2015

SAN FRANCISCO: ALTAR GIRLS LOSE BUT BREAK OUT THE BOOZE

You know I love to make people laugh, and that's led me to be accused of having, what some supervisors (and more than a few coworkers) have called "inappropriate humor."

And there was that restraining order ... But I digress ...

And sometimes I guess I laugh inappropriately ... Archbishop Salvatore Cordileone made me laugh the other day ... Well, indirectly ...

Is it just me or are all bishops named Salvatore tiny and ?
touched?

Anyhow ... A priest in San Francisco has banned girls from serving Mass. He says having girls around makes the boys not want to serve and this in turn diminishes vocations to the priesthood because most priests started out as altar boys.

I wish I was joking.  Sorry folks.
Some priests are threatened by having female altar servers.  There is only room for one princess at a time in most sanctuaries. 

The parish has had female altar servers since the 80's but Father Joseph Illo took over as pastor five months ago and decided to train only boys to be altar servers. He said "he has no choice but to exclude girls because the future of the church is at stake."  (Source)



And we all know that altar girls can't grow up to be priests (no matter how many priests act like big ole girls) because just like there will never be Mass in the vernacular or a non-Italian Pope, there will never be women priests.

And the priest told his disgruntled parishioners not to even think about going to complain to Archbishop Cordileone about his decision because he already got Archbishop Cordileone's approval of his ban on altar girls.

Apparently like Cardinal Burke, Archbishop Cordileone thinks that altar girls are contributing to the feminization of the Church. 

So I got to thinking, if Archbishop Cordileone doesn't want altar girls because women can't become priests, shouldn't he also ban Communion under both species, so that altar boys won't grow up to be Archbishops arrested for drunk driving with their mother and mysterious young passenger in their car?

Or am I comparing screwdrivers to martinis here?

I wonder what he has against the Holy Patriarch Noah that he is so anti-rainbow?


Remember Reverend Fathers, there is only room for one princess at a time in most sanctuaries. And never out dress the boss! 



Alternate hymn for use in bilingual Hispanic parishes:

33 comments:

  1. And in the real world, most men don't choose a vocation or profession based on the absence of women. That the appeal Catholic priesthood is dependent on being a 'no girl zone' is just pathetic. I am a woman, and probably wouldn't even speak with a man who made important vocational/professional decision based on whether or not women were included.

    I did read frz's post on this, a woman who says woman can get nothing out of serving at the altar. Well, glad to see she thinks she can speak for all women. They are all about how the liturgy makes them feel.

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  2. Ha ha...I read one line from the parish's letter to my husband. His response: "Secret Catholic France" -- his all time favorite.

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  3. Where do get these songs Father D?
    Bottle of Wine is perfect for more than one bishop, especially here in Regions One and Two.

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  4. In answer to your question about bishops named Salvatore .... well, Rochesterians can attest to a statistical correlation .... tiny in body, mind, and heart .... though he has yet to play dress-up like Sal Corleone here in Rochester though he has in his native Providence .... oh how many deficiencies these boys must be compensating beneath all that lace and brocade .... and not just the absence of a Y chromosome.

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  5. Drunk Driving... Fuck You Cordelia, you selfish PRICK.

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    Replies
    1. Found this on the arch drunk, errr ahhhhh Archbishop of SF. His mother admits how he "loves his wine" and blames herself for his dui stop.

      Seeing the asshole this guy Pretty Sally Cordelia has turned into she's got a boat load more to apologize for his being a souse.

      http://www.queerty.com/mother-of-archbishop-cordileone-blames-herself-for-dui-arrest-20120828

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  6. What is it with these guys and the strange, out of style headwear?

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  7. This blog isn't funny anymore

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    Replies
    1. Boo hoo for you. Cancel your subscription. Stop your donations. Pull your advertising dollars. Not one more dime. Wanker.

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    2. No, the actual answer is to keep spamming the comboxes and run up the bandwidth usage. It's unlikely any readers here have the technical expertise for a DDoS.

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    3. Not at all, Mr. Hankey. Plenty of expertise around here. If you want to look at a blog that suppresses speech and dissent go back to the little cunt's blog you came from.

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    4. Wow. Anon: 6:47am got a real boner over that comeback. I crumple with humiliation and fear.

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  8. Without penning a word, these poor miserable effetes are writing themselves out of history. They have been splendidly prepared for a world which no longer exists.

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  9. The supportive comments on Fr Z's blog for this San Fran Freak Show are hysterically funny (from one perspective) and downright depressing (from the perspective of reality).

    Ever notice how all these traditionalist Oratories consist of TWO members?

    So is that technically an "Order" or a "Couple"? Hahaha!

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  10. Wow, he doesn't even have to balls to go all the way and ban girls from reading, last time I checked lector is also a step on the way to the priesthood. What a pussy.

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  11. Face it Fr D the Novis Orda is on the decline along wit prists like yous!

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  12. Yous can larf an yous kin cri Fr D. Yous can spit taks bt th writin is on the wall. Bi reverse osmosis the Novis Orda Mass is bein kiled off. Preti soon everione will be wearin dem funi hatz. Get used to it. Onli matr o tim b4 a parish nex 2 u is closin down ... then wil b yr turn. You b fightin for a congrigshun. Then thos trads they's shor gonna lok good. Onli truble is D yous not goin to lok god 2 them. Shame but yous reap wot u sow! An your sowin has bin preti bad, yous hav 2 agri. Stil you can alwais join them Mormins or evangelicals - theys prbli mor 2 yr taste anihows.

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    Replies
    1. Obveeous trol spek truth regaurdles

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    2. ^^^^^^ hey u dumb fuck if your are gonna troll at least learn to spell ...trust me I would love Fr. Ds big D in my mouth but ur post are really dumb and anoying ....get the fuck off of here if your are going to troll like that

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  13. Pope Francis pictured with Fr D

    http://dailyoftheday.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/NewImage46.png

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  14. The Z-trolls are back!!!!! I was wondering where they've been. I thought they probably got picked up by the FBI during one of the recent child-porn stings. But they're back! Surest sign Fr D that you're getting to the whole sick gang of them and maybe a sign that Z is feeling the pinch in his purse. Or maybe his pocketbook.

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    Replies
    1. The Zshyster is at 65.7 percent of his $5k goal as of now. The only way he's going to get the giving thermometer to rise is to stick it up his ass.

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    2. Another minor outbreak of Rabies!

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    3. Rabies?!? ....just a ignorant dumbass...o and by the way fuck u Aristofanny ...for calling me rabid in the past

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    4. You'll always be Babu the Dog Boy to me. Woof!

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  15. Whether we like it or not, the pastor was within his rights.

    Was it a prudent decision? Maybe. Maybe not. I don't have the care of souls of his parish. Some people will applaud him. Others will burn him at the stake. I, for one, don't envy him.

    It is nice to see a bishop like Cordileone who actually supports and backs up his priests who are trying to do the right thing.

    Cordileone had a DUI. Big deal. Priests are people too.

    There was an “unidentified male” in the car. Innuendo: he’s gay.

    Suppose it had been an “unidentified female”. Innuendo: he’s having an affair.

    So much it seems for mercy and presuming good intentions (aka living Gospel charity).

    I hope God is more forgiving than the followers of Pope Francis are ...

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    Replies
    1. Anon 1/29 848am, there's plenty of forgiveness that we followers of Pope Francis are most willing to share. You conservatives give me a hoot! You invoke living Gospel charity when it befits you but otherwise, where are you?

      All this REALLY represents is institutionalized discrimination against females under the guise of protecting "RELIGIOUS" freedom.

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    2. Ecactly His Excelency is a good servent of God ...who here has hasnt had a few and gotten behind a wheel and felt just fine..Fr. big D Iam sure ...the Bishops most definately no fag and upholds the faith, supports his priests, and upholds Catholic doctrine ....one could only pray "Fr" D would do the same ...but alas hes a coward, closet fag, hidding behind this blog ...at lest Z has balls to let you know his real name ....Z hides nothing

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    3. Bro is that really u?

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    4. "Mundabor"... and.... God spoke to this bishop when??? God spoke to you when?

      Here's what Scripture has to say about your drunk bishop and gluttonous priest friends:

      Do not join those who drink too much wine or gorge themselves on meat, for drunkards and gluttons become poor, and drowsiness clothes them in rags. (Proverbs 23:20-21, NIV)

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    5. Since we're proof-texting: "Some have been tempted to say that the church is the church only of the pure. This isn't true. This is a heresy.” - Pope Francis, October 2, 2013

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    6. St. Paul is quite specific in 1 Timothy, the 3rd chapter where he discusses qualities of church leaders. Rather clearly the requirement is NOT perfection BUT some qualities are repeated in various capacities with respect to bishops and deacons:

      1 Timothy 3 English Standard Version (ESV)

      Qualifications for Overseers

      3 The saying is trustworthy: If anyone aspires to the office of overseer, he desires a noble task. 2 Therefore an overseer[a] must be above reproach, the husband of one wife,[b] sober-minded, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, 3 not a drunkard, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. 4 He must manage his own household well, with all dignity keeping his children submissive, 5 for if someone does not know how to manage his own household, how will he care for God's church? 6 He must not be a recent convert, or he may become puffed up with conceit and fall into the condemnation of the devil. 7 Moreover, he must be well thought of by outsiders, so that he may not fall into disgrace, into a snare of the devil.

      Qualifications for Deacons

      8 Deacons likewise must be dignified, not double-tongued,[c] not addicted to much wine, not greedy for dishonest gain. 9 They must hold the mystery of the faith with a clear conscience. 10 And let them also be tested first; then let them serve as deacons if they prove themselves blameless. 11 Their wives likewise must[d] be dignified, not slanderers, but sober-minded, faithful in all things. 12 Let deacons each be the husband of one wife, managing their children and their own households well. 13 For those who serve well as deacons gain a good standing for themselves and also great confidence in the faith that is in Christ Jesus.

      Nice try with the Pope Francis out of context quote. Drunkeness, gluttony and greed do not a church leader make.

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  16. Isn't it funny that the news report doesn't seem to have anyone identified as actual parishioners speaking outside the church? All the civilians are speaking in terms of how they would feel *if* they were in the parish and *if* they were affected by the decision. It seems a bit strange that the reporter seems not to have had people who *were* affected by the decision on camera. Is the priest so effective that no-one wanted to speak up when the news crew descended on the church steps?
    The man is dippy and exotic in all sorts of ways, but the news report looks like a beat-up on an all-too-easy target to me.

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