Friday, December 19, 2014

OUTRAGEOUS PAPAL INITIATIVES CONTINUE: Francis Celebrates 78th Birthday By Giving 400 Sleeping BagsTo Homeless


As if happy couples doing the tango (an obscenely intimate dance practiced by primitive Third World hedonists) wasn't bad enough, and helping to broker peace between estranged nations, and celebrating the TaizĂ© communion service rather than The Eternally Timeless Mass Of All The Endless Ages (well, at least since 1570), Pope Francis ("Bergoglio" as the devoutly reverential and eccleisally docile Trid-Trads of the Krazy Katholic blogosphere refer to him) celebrated his 78th Birthday . . . 


<<GASP-IN-HORROR>>

by asking the Papal Almoner, Archbishop Konrad Krajewski, to distribute 400 sleeping bags to Rome's homeless poor. He was assisted by those few Swiss Guards who were not involved by the Vatican's Gay Lobby in the plot to force Benedict XVI's resignation.

Although traditionally attired in Monsignorial fuchsia while performing official duties as a papal MC, Krajewski was known to spend his free-time in such non-clerical (and therefore non-Fr-Z approved) activities as feeding the hungry, clothing the destitute, visiting the sick and imprisoned . . . "You could tell he was trouble . . . 

. . . dangerously casual," was how one Curial veteran described him. "But then what did you expect, given who promoted him to Archbishop and gave him that important post that one of us should have gotten - signing those parchment Papal Blessings that keep a shitload of shekels rolling in?"

"And remember how Bergoglio just showed up at Krajewski's consecration? House-cassock! Grubby modernist stole from the sacristy! Just got in line and laid on hands! And did you see the motto on his coat-of-arms? Who chooses his motto from the title of a Cardinal Kasper book?"

Speaking of books, Madison's homeless poor this Christmas are hugely in luck! They'll be enjoying free personal copies of THE BOOK to be passed out at homeless shelters and curbsides and alleyways all over Madison! THE BOOK!

Nah, not that book, not the Bible. THE BOOK: "STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE OR GO TO HELL: The Eternally Beatific Upside to Enduring a Miserable Earthly Marriage." An enlightening collection of practical how-to strategies for warring husbands and wives by a committee of (mostly) celibate clerics, some of whom know actual husbands and wives. Yeah, baby! Roast your chestnuts by an open fire with the help of this page-turner!

Elsewhere the Krazy Kath blogosphere has announced that loudspeakers will be set up outside churches in New York City where the True Mass is being offered by formerly utterly null and absolutely void convert clergy with wives and facial hair, so that the city's homeless can listen to Palestrina's famed "Missa Beati Pauperes for 47 Voices and a Half Dozen Organists". More tidings of comfort and joy: Free podcasts of the Gaudete Sunday Sermon: "REJOICE? My Ass!" are still available!

Begoglio and his sleeping bags? Bah, humbug! (Although, in a nod to tradition, the sleeping bags are said to be embossed with the papal crest. That should count from something with the Krazies, ecclesiastical heraldry being one of the major preoccupations of that krowd . . . right after damask and catafalques).

Of course my parish will be more like this:

19 comments:

  1. So the report on the American sisters got released this week and I still haven't read a misogynist screed over at Z's. I wonder if someone told him to can the rhetoric.

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    1. Dom Douxhenozzle doesn't disappoint. He suffered an ejaxulatory delay spewing his latest.

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  2. And here's the precious, over fed, indulged, provided for and underworked partially converted Anglican ponce parodying someone else and missing the point about himself:

    20 December 2014



    " Dear Old Mother Hilarious

    A friend tells me that at the moment, the C of E, dear sweet old thing, is agonising over 'the Green Report'. It's a laugh a line. Don't miss it. It reads like a satirical spoof by Mgr R A Knox. Perhaps it is.

    Another friend tells me of an Anglican Diocese which has invented an 'Archdeacon for Generous Giving'. In other words, the pew-fodder shell out for the stipend of an archdeacon whose job it then is to screw even more money out of them! (But 'Green' is going to cost £2,000,000.)

    Turkeys not so much voting as paying for Christmas! Like buying tickets to gain admission to the abattoir!

    Magnifique!! Trebles all round! Pass another mince pie!


    Posted by Fr John Hunwicke at 15:17

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    1. The more that this old fart Honeywagondipper writes, the more I'm convinced that he's an end stage drunkard.

      I'm quite certain that this ass clown has value accumulated in his C of E pension as well as the others participating in this ill informed experiment. Why not just pension off the old dead wood and re-assign the younger of these Catholic wannabes to regular formed churches working under the supervision of genuine Catholic priests...

      Time to act to clean up these road apples from the path to Rome.

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  3. And its another Birthday too.....the Katholik Kalvinist Almanac!


    Ninth Anniversary of Rorate Caeli


    "This blog was launched nine years ago today. We thank Almighty God for the countless graces He has showered upon this apostolate, for the many souls that have been nourished by Catholic truth, encouraged by signs of hope, challenged by the demands of tradition, driven to prayer and fasting by the need to exorcise the demons of our time -- and, above all, moved to greater love and fidelity to Our Lord Jesus Christ, King of Kings and Lord of Lords.


    How often have we felt like crying out, with the Prophet Isaiah, with the people of Israel, with all God-fearing souls throughout the centuries: "O that thou wouldst rend the heavens and come down, that the mountains might quake at thy presence -- as when fire kindles brushwood and the fire causes water to boil -- to make thy name known to thy adversaries, and that the nations might tremble at thy presence!" (Isa 64:1-2). Now, more than ever, O Lord, rend the heavens and come down to save Thy People, in captivity, in exile, wandering in the desert of modernity!"


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    1. Great! Nine years of throwing daily tantrums. God isn't about to come down and save them. The daily bitching would keep even God away.

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  4. One more thing for today... I finally got around to watching the tango vid and it was so gratifying to see happy people celebrating! I also got around to reading the reviews of the 5 Cardinals or bishops or whateverthefuck book and am thankful that I didn't waste the $$ to buy the piece of junk. Hey, if it's really true that this is being handed out to the homeless will there at least be a pint of gasoline included??

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  5. He seems to have missed the obvious irony in posting this:

    http://wdtprs.com/blog/2014/12/a-breakthrough/

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  6. And Pope Francis has delivered a bit of Christmas joy to the Roman Curia. Bets are that Zippo the Inflatable will not mention this one just as he has not gone within a bull's roar of the Vatican statement on the LCWR nor the latest 'inconvenience' for his friend Pavone.

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    1. Yeah, Christmas joy in fifteen parts.

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  7. Mother Johanna Mary Hairywikkies does not approve in the least!

    22 December 2014


    Christmas Address to the Curia

    "If somebody addressed a body to which I belonged, just before Christmas, in that sort of way, with sixteen paragraphs of sustained and immoderate abuse, I think I would ...

    I think someone should have a word with him."


    Posted by Fr John Hunwicke at 21:27

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    1. I have TWO WORDS for the Holy Father with regard to what he said: THANK YOU!

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    2. Interesting that those who are usually in favor of "tough love" in the Church, get rather indignant when it is directed toward them and their hero figures.

      This reminded me of a former religious superior, who admonished our class in a similar manner for the good of our souls. It took me another five years to actually "hear" that message. A good superior will always give the opportunity to reform ourselves before taking action to help us toward that reform, for the sake of our salvation.

      If anyone happens upon the full text of that message in English, please post the link here or drop me an email with it. Thanks!

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    3. This is the least editorialized version that I found: http://vaticaninsider.lastampa.it/en/the-vatican/detail/articolo/francesco-francisco-francis-38200/

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  8. The Popes Christmas letter.....is perfect....better then a bonus...guess no cappa shopping this year for some...sounds like number 15 is directed to the cape bandit

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    1. A good reflection for all of us really.
      Long live Pope Francis!

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    2. And see the square bracketed vicious stomping and put-down Zoolstoff gives to a layperson for a comment which blind-sides him and offends his sense of clericalist entitlement and privilege: "You lay people in the pews, listen and participate as the priest speaks to God......" And this spray is directed at the 'stupid lay people who fund this asshole to the tune of tens of thousands of dollars per year!

      Last names are a post-medieval innovation, so they don’t have much importance in the life of the Church. We don’t pray in the canon for Pope [LastName1] and Bishop [LastName2]. We use their *Christian* names, right? [An entirely different context. Also, “we” don’t pray that. FATHER does. You, laypeople in the pews, listen and participate by listening as the priest speaks to God about his, and our, relationship with the Pope and his, and your, bishop. The priest is your intermediary. Sometimes he isn’t talking to you.] If a priest makes a point of wanting only his family name used, it gives the impression that he’s following secular conventions about professional status."

      This character is a stark raving bloody mad man.

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    3. First, if Zoopstick were truly blindsided he would have edited out the comment. He is a man-c**t who does NOT tolerate debate.

      There is another write-up on this con artist from a conservative Catholic blog called Novus Ordo Watch which pretty much sums the Zmeister up as a shyster from the perspective of the right also: http://www.novusordowatch.org/wire/sad-case-zuhlsdorf.htm

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  9. Mr. Zuhlsdorf:
    The more I read and attempt to learn and understand the vile screeds you publish on your site for which you don't have the manhood to allow discussion; the more deeply and profoundly I find myself disgusted by you.

    To the rest of the good Christians who may see this greeting, a most joyous Christmas!

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