Friday, December 6, 2013

GUEST POST: Sister The Movie, Name That Nun Flick

Father D does not necessarily endorse the views of any guest post writer. Freedom of speech, freedom of expression. I do occasionally edit guest posts for charity and accuracy.

When the Evil Vatican Empire censures American nuns for “radical feminism,” three sisters stand up for their spiritual convictions.
The production com[any is having a title contest here to name the film documentary in progress.  Prizes include a copy of the film when finished and the forthcoming swag (a hot T-shirt and messenger bag) Imagine a brand new bag, with a picture of three old bags depicted on it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Father D ~~~~~~~~~

Ok, so Dykes on Bikes is out - both way too obvious and they're on buses and in cars in this video clip ....

But whatever to name this .... frightening (to be kindly understated) documentary ... You heard the joke about the Erie Benedictines being not eerie but down right terrifying? Wait till you see this ...

Sound of Music? The Singing Nun? The Nun's Story? 

Fuggeddaboutit !!!

No habits in this flick except for the historical pictures. And speaking of historical, no one under 70 either.

There's a hard-nosed, pissed-off butt-tokin' broad on her way to counsel prisoners at some place run by the Episcopal Church (from the shield on the sign), a Church whose nuns still do wear habits, by the way.

And there's the famous "Democratic Dames Shillin' For Capt Barry Obama of the Choomb Gang" (aka "Nuns on the Bus" ... None of whom were, technically, "Nuns" but Sisters; and most of whom flew between cities and climbed on the bus for photo ops as they pulled up to Republican legislators' offices to bitch about immigration and health care ... conveniently avoiding the Planned Parenthood abortion clinics upon which their hero, our President, asked God's blessings ....)

Speaking of Dem Dames, there's a great shot of Sister Simone Campbell speaking at ... The Democrat National Convention. From that same podium, Joe Kennedy 3.0, whose family bought him a Congressional seat in Taxachusetts, introduced a testimonial (of beatification quality) on his Uncle Ted "the Swimmer" Kennedy, of Chappaquiddick fame, whose autobiography was entitled True Compass and whose dog, a Portuguese water spaniel, was named "Splash" (kind of like OJ Simpson naming his dog "Slash") ... all irony (not to mention propriety) entirely lost on this most Catholic of US political dynasties. Yup, the Lion of the Senate, well-known captain in the battle against the evil Republicans' War on Women (who better to discuss vulnerable women than a Catholic Kennedy). From that same podium, Barack Hussein Obama would later declare Planned Parenthood "here to stay and God bless you!" Now why on earth would the Holy See question such a faithful Sister as Sister Campbell? Bastards!

Speaking of the Holy See, there's a weird shot of the Sisters standing in St Peter's Square - that bus was amazing! - as the white smoke poured from the Sistine Chapel chimney ... They had just discovered some women's images in ancient Roman mosaics that "proved" (to their satisfaction at least) women priests in the first centuries .... Surely that will convince the new Pope ...

If watching this pathetic documentary doesn't "send you to prayer", nothing will! The "Prayer for a Happy Death" that Sister Mary Wenceslaus taught us in 3rd Grade comes to mind. As the butt-smokin' Sister, who huffs and puffs her way to the nuns' cemetery in the video, puts it so well as she looks at the majority population of her community: "Changes better hurry up. I don't have a lot of time to fool around with this stuff, ya know?" From your lips, "honey"!

 Sorry about the boat Sister. We'll have a bus by the time we get to D.C.


  1. "Bridezillas of Christ" ???

  2. Readerette here. Regarding Sr Campbell's organization:

    It's not NETwhine.
    It's not NETblog.
    It's not NETbeg.
    It's even not NetShillCoffeeForCrazyMonks.
    It's NETWORK.

    Something the gourmet mendicant does not do.

  3. Sister Campbell isn't as annoying as the Z-man, but she is still annoying. I don't think that Sister Campbell's version of social justice involves her meeting with actual poor people. It seems that she gives speeches to liberal groups for a fee and spends lots of time taking photo ops and going on talk shows. That being said I really don't like Burke and his clones who seem to have popped up in many a U.S. diocese. Could we just say that the men who dress like Liberace and the aging ex hippie sisters are both annoying? Pox on both their houses.

    1. "Could we just say that the men who dress like Liberace and the aging ex hippie sisters are both annoying?"

      Together in unison? In Gregorian Chant? Byzantine Chant?
      Father D's GOLD STAR of the week!